Band: Vylet Pony | Album: Monarch of Monsters | Genre: Alternative rock, Progressive rock | Year: 2024
From: Portland, USA | Label: Horse Friends Music
For fans of: Meer, Tool, angsty music from 1998-2006
This record has been generating a lot of buzz lately, and I think it’s only about 60% related to the semi-erotic furry artwork that graces the album cover. And considering Vylet Pony’s origins, such album art makes sense.
Vylet Pony is a one-woman project based out of Portland. She got her start in music in the early 2010s making My Little Pony-themed electronic music. I’ve never seen My Little Pony. I’m sure it’s a perfectly fine show, but it’s one of those things that had (has? Is brony-dom still going? I don’t wanna research it.) one of the most irritating fanbases I’ve ever encountered. I classify it the same way as things like Steven Universe and Doctor Who: shows I’ve heard generally positive things about but with a fandom so annoying, I’m never going to watch any of it.
However, I strive to be a serious music critic on this site, and acts can evolve well beyond their origins. Hell, if you told me back in college that I’d like a Job for a Cowboy record, I would’ve said you were nuts. If someone got their start in music in a niche I found personally grating, I think I can set that aside if they really have put out a great album.
Now, as regular readers of my site know by now, I’m not a lyrics guy. I like the sound of the human voice, but I usually don’t care about the specific words themselves. There are exceptions, and when there are those exceptions, it’s usually a bad sign for the album in question (*cough* Somalgia *cough*). Monarch of Monsters is based on a novella by the artist. I didn’t read it, and I’m not planning to. I’m writing this during Thanksgiving week, and I don’t really have the time to. (I’m also honestly not much of a fiction reader, either.) I wanted to get that out there for full disclosure.
The album kicks off with “Pest”, and it’s got a nice, bouncy piano line that reminds me of some late ‘90s alt-rock acts. Strings and trumpet add some richness, and Vylet Pony’s voice is quite nice. There’s a lot of angst to this song, and it’s pretty decent alt-rock, truth be told. The loud and quiet moments contrast quite well.
“PLAY DEAD! PLAY DEAD!” features a lot of nu-metal influence. I didn’t like nu-metal the first time around, and I still don’t like it now that it’s having something of a pop-culture resurgence. I can’t comment on the quality of it, in relation to other nu-metal, but it’s not for me. “The Heretic (Woe Is Me)” continues in this general vein of late-90s/early-00s-style metal and rock that I’m simply not a fan of. The vocal performance is pretty strong, though.
I like “Survivor’s Guilt” more. It’s got a more restrained, subdued feel to it, and the vaguely wooden-sounding synths remind me of ‘80s art-pop acts like Peter Gabriel or Kate Bush. The guitars are ragged and jangly, and I again need to compliment the vocal performance. This could have easily been a minute or more shorter, however. “Vitality Glitch” features some fittingly glitchy production, but in the end it sounds like something off an anime soundtrack.
At this point, I was thinking, to paraphrase Lunchlady Doris, there’s very little prog in this record. Why is this tagged as “progressive rock” on RYM and Bandcamp? Sure the synth solo in “Vitality Glitch” was nice, but a flashy solo does not a prog record make.
Finally, with the 12-minute “The Wallflower Equation”, we get something that fits this site’s purview. A sinister drone and jumpy, Middle Eastern-tinged synth pattern instantly give this song an anxious atmosphere. Sharp and dry guitar cuts through this, and the staccato drumming keeps this song constantly on its toes. Big blasts of synth practically overwhelm everything else before finally fading away to a squeaking, Van der Graaf-y sax solo.
The intensity of this song is enthralling, and the wordless vocals around the seven-minute mark are especially powerful. The opening synth pattern persists in one form or another through most of the song, lending everything a sense of cohesion. The final few minutes, though, are quiet, spare, and acoustic, giving a sense of loneliness.
“Princess Cuckoo” is tense and terrified-sounding. I’m sure it’s important to the narrative, but this bit of narration and start-stop music doesn’t make for the most enjoyable listening over its four-and-a-half-minute runtime. It’s loud and staticky and noisy, and it makes an impact, so it’s effective.
The 22-minute monster “Sludge” opens with a sinister air I’d expect from a doom metal record. It’s hypnotic and occultic, with hazy guitar and murky vocals. Things gradually swell before suddenly dropping out. Dramatic, reedy organ blasts further add to the horror this cut has been cultivating. Punishing walls of noise contrast against much more stripped-back passages, reminding me of an updated version of certain Mars Volta songs.
Near its midway point, “Sludge” suddenly pivots into something halfway between post-punk and classic krautrock. The rhythm is insistent, with jangly, repetitive guitars. There’s a killer synth solo that blazes across everything, and sax gets its turn in the spotlight, too. In the song’s final five minutes, it plunges into a metallic storm of distortion with jagged riffs and odd-time asides.
Unfortunately, after “Sludge”, Monarch of Monsters doesn’t have an awful lot for me. “Revenge Fantasy” pulls from strains of alt-rock and alt-metal I don’t like, and it features big, glossy synths that are a not-fun kind of overblown. The verses also are a bit light for my liking. A lot of this is simply a matter of taste. I’d hesitate to call this song “bad,” but it does feel somewhat incongruous with the two epics. This song in particular is also way too long and again veers into anime OST territory.
“Huntress” also sounds like something I’d expect to hear on an anime soundtrack, and it’s just not a style I like. Sometimes I can articulate why I like or dislike something, and sometimes I can’t. This is one of those times where words fail me. This just ain’t for me.
Completely shifting the mood, “…and, as her howl echoed unto eventide, she became the far seer’s hunting dog…” is just straight-up noise rock. It’s not bad in isolation, but it does kinda feel like it lacks a real payoff. And closing things out is “Rest Now, Little Wolf (A Vigil For Aria, or, How the Lamb Stood in an Empty Room Filled with Empty Friends)”, which once more goes back to the anime OST sounds, but this time mixed with some alright post-rock.
Jesus, that was a long review, but Monarch of Monsters is a long album. I’ve got some split feelings on this. The two longest songs (which comprise about 40% of the album’s runtime) are both absolutely stellar and are two of the best songs I’ve heard all year. However, the rest of the record ranges from “alright” to “simply not for me.” I felt out of my depth for decent chunks of it, but not in a way that makes me want to explore those sounds more. If you’ve got broader and more diverse tastes than I do, you may like it; but as it stands, this record falls firmly into the “mixed bag” category for me.
Score: 63/100
The Elite Extremophile 
